wild heart.

like little children …. innocent and pure
to be free …. and ever obscure
laughing and living life beautifully
so solemn and im serenity
that is life…. a piece of art
untamed… like my wild wild heart. Continue reading


heart.mind.body.and soul

when you let me fill your empty walls…
you filled my empty heart
you have made me stand tall
and that made me make a new start
i saw myself as a human being
capable of love and believing
that walls need to crumble down
as my heart ends its frown.
i am not looking for something
but something stirred up inside me
maybe it would be worth trying
maybe i should just wait and see.
you had the key ….so unexpectedly
my walls fell down the ground
like a crashing tidal wave
the fortress i thought
i would bring to my grave
the walls i have long fought.
left me yearning to love you more
and the fear of loving you
has brought me up and back to the floor
as i reach for the pieces
of the walls you let fall
to let me in… inside your heart
inside your mind… body and soul.

Continue reading


I would love it so much if you take a break

And think of me and how much I ache

To spend as many moments we can have together

Even if we know that we will always have forever.
Continue reading

life is a paradox.

We spend our whole life searching

For our one true love

And we also have to accept our fate

That to wait forever is just never too late Continue reading

intertwined fate.


intertwined fate
infinite love
each half of our hearts,
thats all we have.
we are far richer
than we can imagine
with love…
then we can begin

the wild child.

once there was a little girl who loves to play and laugh her heart out. she was so carefree that she didnt care whether she got dirt on her clothes or get soaked under the rain. she is just a wild child. a kind, but restless soul. she had a friend… a little boy who looks so clean with his pressed grown up shirt with collars and khaki shorts. he looks so sleek and so proper. he was amazed how free spirited the little girl was. the little girl didnt care whether she was alone or with othe friends, she just seem so happy and blissful all the time. so the little befriended her. the little girl was apalled as to how someone like him chose her to be his only friend…

they became friends and the little boy always gave the little girl candies. how thrilled was the little girl… even when she had very little candy sometimes, she still gave away some whenever she sees other little kids. the days went by and the little boy would sometimes pull her hair, or kick her playfully but still give her candies. the little girl would just dismiss it sometimes, trying to understand him that he didnt mean it, or he might just be having a bad day when his mommy and daddy got angry if they saw his clothes have gotten dirty. sometimes the little boy would tell her that he is her only real friend. he promised her that he will take care of her because no other friends would befriend her because she always has dirt on her clothes. the little girl didnt believe it at first but then, he told her that he is the only one who cares enough to give him candies and lollipops that glitter. the little girl couldnt understand herself anymore. when she would call her other playmates, the little boy wouldnt talk to her anymore. so she decided to devote her time and herself to the only person who promised to take care of her.

the little girl became different. she still loves to share whatever the little boy could give her. she helps those in need in order for her to feel happy. but part of her is missing now. she seems to have lost her spirit. the little boy continues to sometimes kick her, slap her, punch her or pull her hair. the little girl thought it couldnt hurt as much as it already did…

then one day, the little boy grew tired of the little girl… he found a new playmate. and he left the little girl with nothing to fend for herself as the little boy asked someone else to tell her to move out of their big house. the little girl left.

the little girl asked help from a wise grown up on what to do. how to go about losing her only friend. she never told anyone about all the things the little boy did to her. she was too ashamed of herself, of her choices but most of all, it was because she was trying to protect the cleanness of the little boy.

the wise grown up lady was fair. she told the little boy to always give the little girl candies, one big lollipo and and a gingerbread. with what candies she gets from the little boy, she began to share and help others in need. somewhere along the way, the little girl became a woman… she spent days in solitude, pondering over her life, her lost friend and her dreams. she then remembers that she has bigger dreams than just saving up candies and collecting sparkling gummy bears, and gooey strips like leather. all she had was her big lollipop and gingerbread. and it was just about enough for the little boy to keep threatening her of taking it all back again.. it was enough for him to call her a thief. even if it was given accordingly and he agreed on that arrangement.

she thoguht to herself: i dont need a big lollipop. i could sell the big lollipop and buy dozens of small ones. but i dont need dozens of lollipops.. i just need one and with whatever change i can get, i can use it to help others more and start over tobe happy again. when the little boy found out that she sold her giant lollipop, he was furious. he hit her, slammed her head against the wall, slapped her, kicked her and did other things inhumane. he didnt care if one tiny little girl saw it all. he just wanted to hurt her for selling the giant lolipop that the wise grown up told him to give her.

all this time, the little girl kept quiet. it was bad enough for. him to do those things, much less tell the world everything about it. so she just went on with her life, and never look back. but the little boy wouldnt let her be. he continues to make her life miserable. the little girl sincerly hope that his new playmate would be enough to keep him busy. to make him happy. then maybe, he’d just leave her alone and continue to meet his end of the bargain.

he wanted to bruise her so badly, break her and let her fall. but the little girl just kept on flying about, spreading cheer and trying to make the world a better place and wish eveyrone else well.

one day, somebody needed a gingerbread and the little girl offered to give her a part of her gingerbread.. this infuriated the little boy as miss goody two shoes told tales and stretched the truth. you see, the little boy will listen and believe everything he wants to.. the little boy asked the little girl to send the stranger away. but the little girl refuses because she cannot bare to think of the stranger who became close to her with out a place to sleep at nignt. the stranger reminder the little girl of herself from years before the little boy came to her life. the little boy threatened the little girl that he’ll kick her out, and not let her in. so the little girl instead help her find her way.

the little girl didnt do anything and moved on again. but the little boy wouldnt let her be… he went to the wise grown up and told her what she did. and more. the little girl just smiled and continue to wish the little boy well and happiness. she continues to pray that maybe, someday, he might learn to see the truth, accept his mistakes and be real again. she continues to pray that maybe somedsy, he will realize that even if he has gotten dirt on his clothes, or that his shoes are dirty or his hair is uncombed… or that his room is a mess, it doesnt matter at all, because deep inside, you know inside that you are kind and your heart is pure. even with all the messy clothes.



restless soul



For so long now, I was misunderstood

Stereotyped, they never saw the good

Its not their fault, I never let them see

That somehow, I kept hidden the best in me.

Little did I know I was living a superficial lie

Dozens of earrings and purses cannot satisfy

Different shades of make up to cover my face

From the sadness I didn’t want to trace.

One would think I never really cared at all

Until one day, my world started to crumble

Only then did I realize that diamonds are never enough

It takes so more than that to make someone tough.

The days gone by and it turned to years,

I bought earrings to cover my ears…

I chose to ignore what my heart once said

Be your own person, or you’d rather be dead.

Change is good but leave some for yourself.

It won’t be healthy if you turn out to be someone else

But I chose to deny what my heart was crying out loud

It was deafening but I was just too proud..

We worked so hard to be with each other in the past

I thought nothing can ever come between us…

Little by little, the spark just somehow died

I was wrong not to listen to that nagging voice inside.

Even as I lay right next to you,

we seem so far apart

It wasn’t the same as it was from the start

How lost were we among our own desires;

That we forgot to fuel each other’s fires?

Too late now for the if only’s of the earth

 I cannot dwell on that coz I cannot find its worth

All we had to do was to sit down and have a talk

Or go out the backyard and take a little walk.

I wanted to save every little thing that was left of us

But I am not one to nag…

Although I should’ve asked

I became different from the one you were with

I was smiling outside but inside, I bleed.

It wasn’t only I who started to change.

If only I had the guts to tell you I find it strange

That we weren’t the same person we were before

Why was I too scared to ask?

I shouldn’t have ignored.

We fill in the void with worldly stuff

At the end of the day, it just wasn’t enough

We missed the trip, we missed the flight

We were so engrossed to see the light.

all these time, I was living a superficial life

I wasn’t made to be just a trophy wife

Day in, day out… I longed to be completely whole

It just wasn’t enough for my poor restless soul.


Tuesday, May 24, 2011 11:45 PM

how to listen to the nudges of your heart.


Updated Apr 02, 2013
how to listen to the nudges of your heart

a guest post by christopher foster ofthe happy seeker
Life can be unpredictable at times (English understatement). What do we do when trouble or disaster looms suddenly?

Here’s a lesson I learned many years ago:

I was 22 or 23, burning brush on a ranch in British Columbia. I must have been daydreaming because I looked up and saw with horror that the fire I had set was getting away on me.

It was putting on speed and galloping toward the nearby forest in an ever-widening circle.

Yikes. Nothing like a fire to focus the mind.

I jumped up, grabbed my shovel, and beat desperately at the nearest flames. I continued doing this for a few moments, putting some of the flames out, or so I thought. But when I looked back, I saw that the pesky little monsters I thought I had erased were simply re-creating themselves and springing back to life.

I felt a moment of panic. But then this interesting thing happened. It was like a quiet voice inside me gave me an instruction. “Be still,” it said. “Slow down and think, or this is going to turn into a nightmare.” I listened to that little voice. So much patience it took.

I began to move slowly and methodically around the circle of flames, making very sure that each section of the fire was out before I moved on. I don’t know how long it took. But perhaps half an hour later I stood up and looked around and saw a wonderful sight. The nearby haystacks were safe. The nearby forest was safe. I had two large, cold drinks and thanked my lucky stars.

listen to our own inner wisdom

As our lives become increasingly busy and the world wobbles in alarming ways there is one thing, I have learned, upon which I can always depend. Listening to the little nudges of my own heart. I don’t catch them all but I sure do my best. Three steps that are essential in my experience are these.

three essential steps.

1. Stop. Slow down. Sometimes, faced with an emergency, we simply act spontaneously as the situation demands. But most of the time, with a difficult decision to make, or a priority to choose, we have time to be still for a moment and step back from the situation. For me, that is always the first step.

2. Listen Life is very clever. Sometimes it only needs that moment of silence for the answer to a problem to appear. Sometimes it happens when we give up. But as you make a habit of listening to that still small voice within yourself will find something quite magical happens. You realize that stillness is not empty. All the wisdom of the universe is there. We have not been forgotten.

3. Trust The last step is trust. I honestly don’t know what would have happened in my little story if I had not trusted my inner voice. In my experience there is a hand of grace upon every one of us.

It is not wisdom that comes from far away, it is our own grace and it loves us. It will never pleave us. But we have to do our bit and listen.

Christopher Foster is an author, blogger, and teacher. He writes about aging and the unconquerable spirit in us all from the perspective of a 79-year-old. For more from Christopher please visit The Happy Seeker.






Posted: 16 Dec 2012 07:52 PM PST

spiritual forgiveness

I had intended to write about the topic of forgiveness solely in regards to

spiritual awakening and the embodying of spirituality in the heart, but given current recent events, I wanted to take a few moments to talk about the shootings at the elementary school in Connecticut.There are no words to fully describe how sad and awful this is. That an individual could be so grossly and dangerously unconscious to choose to act in such violent ways is a reminder of the depth of the insanity that is in this world. But in saying this, the only real thing to be done is to forgive.

Yes, there are already big issues coming up around gun control, mental health, and so forth. They should all be looked at and attended to. Big issues too often are ignored until something really bad happens. Also, there’s a big national dialogue that needs to happen about the culture of violence and how it is glorified in the U.S. But more important is forgiving this individual because without forgiveness, people cannot fully grieve and heal. Without healing, hatred and despair grow up and morph and twist into new terrible expressions. If anything, this individual represents all of our represented and hidden insanity and sickness. We cannot rationalize him away. We cannot say that he is an aberration. The path of divine love accepts all as part of us, including this individual.

And let’s not forget that all violent murder is terrible. The fact that this happened to young children is a wake up call. It’s dramatic, but it’s no less tragic than the death going on in Syria or that happens to anyone else at any time in any place. No one deserves such a terrible fate, and I hope many of you remember that because it also helps to de-rationalize ideas like war, which is when we wrap up murder in a whole bunch of layers of rationalization to decide that it is okay to commit violence to others. It isn’t.

Forgiving Others and Forgiving Ourselves

The path of forgiveness tend to have two big avenues: forgiving others and forgiving ourselves. Even in the elementary school shootings, administrators, parents, and even the students will have to forgive themselves. They will have to forgive themselves for all the things that they could not do and could not prevent. They will have to forgive themselves for their powerlessness. And of course, they will have to forgive the perpetrator. This is no other way around it. This world is so mired in old wounds and hatred that forgiveness is absolutely urgent. It’s one of the ways that we break the cycles of pain. Because if we do not forgive, we sink even more deeply into pain, and then we react to the world from spaces of pain and fear and hatred, which spreads the dis-ease even more.

I never told you that the spiritual path would be easy, and if you are reading this and have been closely touched by the horrible tragedy in Connecticut, you have my deepest and profoundest love and condolences. I could not imagine experiencing it for myself. But with that said, you are at a pivotal place in time and history. With the eyes of the nation and the world on you, you have the amazing opportunity to forgive and show others the power and depth of that forgiveness. You have the power to show people a better way to face extreme emotional pain than to simply lash out at someone else and blame something, which only continues the cycles of pain. I know it is amazingly hard. I know you feel like this is something that should never have happened. Bus it has, and for your own sake, those in your life, and all those around the world, your forgiveness can be a game-changer and the opening of a greater doorway to a better life for us all.

Awakening to Your Emotional Pain

With that, some people will have major spiritual openings and awakenings because of this tragedy. Tragedy has the power to pull us into the present moment. It tears away the many veils of illusions. Suddenly stock market portfolios, soccer schedules, and what to watch on TV become extremely ridiculous concerns. And they are. With tragedy comes a kind of sacred revealing that is also part of the grand unfolding of the universe. With the greater the tragedy, the more difficult it is to deny it, although denial is still an amazing agent. If some people can say that the Holocaust didn’t happen, denial is possible with everything. But in the face of tragedy it is much harder to ignore and to deny. That opens our eyes. That opening may lead to many things on the spiritual path including the realization of all the other emotional pain still within you.

In so many ways, we have all been living in constant pain. It’s a very humbling thing, and as I warm up to the topic of embodying divine love and awakening in your heart, I once again want to remind you that awakening has not brought the pain. The pain was already there. The awakening has simply brought a flood of light into you to clearly see the pain and to provide you with the extra push to release it. Wherever you resist this impetus to heal, the pain grows worse, and individuals can fall into very deep and dark places depending on the darkness that they are carrying in their own hearts. As I often remind people, you are not meant to suffer in this time of a transition. Instead, there are times to let go, and there times to ask for help. Be sure you stay present for which you need to do to allow this transition

Clearing the Emotional Body: Purging and Grief

As many of my students know, it can get messy on the spiritual path and definitely when working with me. I should probably send out regular reminders to my women students to not wear make-up because of it. There’s really no point, and it really turns things into a hot mess visually speaking for sure. But seriously, emotions come up on this path. In connecting with me, I’m kind of like some extra energy to lift up things that have been hiding in the darkness of the heart. It helps to see what is there and release it, and crying is one of the easiest ways to release pain. I often also work with students to create visualizations to release darkness and unconsciousness. Breathwork helps. Drinking lots of water also helps.

In short, the inner world is getting a major clean out during awakening. Even if you are not embodying awakening, you will very likely go through these cycles on your spiritual journey. The difference tends to be that those not in awakening need help to get these cycles moving properly while those in awakening tend to have the cycles happening naturally. For those in awakening, working with me can really make it feel like things are on overdrive, and in truth, many times I’m helping people slow down and stabilize first before dredging up anything new. It really depends on what I am called to do and say, and I never really know until I am in that moment.

Discovering Your Hatred and Anger for Others

It’s truly humbling to see what is hiding down in the depths of the heart. Even people who have considered themselves kind people and have worked to be loving and open-hearted throughout their lives will find things hidden inside. Old family ties, old issues, and forgotten karma–all of this stuff can hide out in any of us. Suddenly, deep anger arises, and you want to lash out with words or fists. You may be overwhelmed. Perhaps than you are ashamed. Depending on the issue, there may be things that you need to talk out in a safe space with someone. Through that connection you can offer your forgiveness to whoever for whatever happen. Sometimes that space isn’t there, so a letter you never send or recording a video that you never post can be another way to offer forgiveness.

Whatever the issue is, you have to let it go. That’s the only way to open your heart wider. Grudges and grievances are chains wrapped around your heart, and they will only constrict you, exhaust you, and keep you locked in cycles of pain. Forgiveness is one of the ways we break free, and in forgiving others, you free them as well.

Discovering Your Self-Loathing

But then we go another layer deeper, and suddenly, you can see all your own hatred for yourself. In so many ways, we often blame ourselves when we are hurt. Even in places where there was no possible way that we could be responsible, we blame ourselves. We get angry that we couldn’t control something. We get angry that we couldn’t make our spouse or partner love us. We get angry that we couldn’t make a business succeed. We get angry that we couldn’t make our children be more safe, more successful, or something else. This self-loathing pointed inwards can become the blackest kind of hatred. It has led people to do many violent and unconscious things. That’s why your awakening may feel so intense and inssistent to look at this aspect of your heart. Because the true you knows that nothing can be left out and that self-love is the only space from which to truly be at peace and harmony with the world. Any external love we offer to the world must be founded in true self-love, and self-hatred–those places where we despise and reject ourselves–goes counter to that space of love.

Which is why forgiveness is a powerful, powerful tool. There will be many tears, and you will also have to forgive yourself for not knowing all the painful things that you did to yourself. This is part of the destruction of the myth of ignorance is bliss. The more you see the repercussions of the actions and non-actions you’ve chosen in your life, the more you understand just how massive the pain and suffering has been that you’ve endured at your own hands through your ignorance.

The Many Tears: A River to Salvation

For many men, crying is not okay in this culture. For many women, they’ve also adopted this unfortunate idea. That idea must go. Tears can be the clearing rain to wash away the mud. This is not getting lost in emotions, which is a topic for another blog post. This is allowing your emotions to arise and then releasing them through forgiveness. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. And then repeat.

Do it as many times and in as many ways necessary until you feel the unmistakable release within you (If the idea of release is new to you, please read this blog post about releasing pain). Because your heart needs room to open. It needs space to fill itself with the beauty of love, and while love accepts all things, you will find that you do not need to carry any more pain than you absolutely have to. The further you embody your awakened self, the more you will see how much pain is hidden within you. Furthermore, you’ll want to get rid of more and more. Relaxing into your divine awarness becomes a sole focus, but not a goal. It is where you intend to rest your consciousness, and from this profound foundation, you can move clearly and lovingly throughout your life.

Forgiveness is a key element along the way to this beautiful space of inner rest and ease. So if there is pain in your heart, turn to forgiveness to release it and to set your heart free.

10 Ways to Break Your Own Heart.


10 Ways to Break Your Own Heart



10 Ways to Break Your Own Heart

The worst kind of heartache is the kind you inflict on yourself.

If you don’t want to break your own heart, then don’t…

  1. Let people invalidate or minimize how you feel. – If you feel something, you feel it and it’s real to you.  Nothing anyone says has the power to invalidate that, ever.  No one else lives in your body, or sees life through your eyes.  No one else has lived through your exact experiences.  And so, no one else has the right to dictate or judge how you feel.  Your feelings are important.  Don’t let anyone lead you to believe otherwise.
  2. Regret every mistake you’ve ever made. – If you regret some of the decisions you’ve made in the past, stop being so hard on yourself.  At that time, you did your best with the knowledge you had.  At that time, you did your best with the experience you had.  Your decisions were made with a younger mind.  If you were to make these decisions with the wisdom you have now, you would choose differently.  So give yourself a break.  Time and experience has a wonderful way of helping us prosper, grow and learn to make better choices today, for ourselves and those we care for.  Read Emotional Freedom.
  3. Take your loved ones for granted. – Someday, for one reason or another, there will be someone you miss dearly.  Missing this person will have nothing to do with how long it’s been since you’ve seen them, or the amount of time since you’ve talked.  It will be about that very moment when you’re doing something and you wish they were right there with you.  So be sure to appreciate every moment you get to spend with the people who matter to you.
  4. Let your ego get the best of you. – Sometimes we choose to be wrong, not because we really are wrong, but because we value our relationship more than our pride.  When two people who care about each other fight, both are wrong.  They have put some kind of superficial outcome over love and compromise.  The one who apologizes and makes up first, is the one who is right.
  5. Get involved in every petty argument that comes your way. – Being strong doesn’t mean you have to stay and fight all the battles and petty arguments that come your way.  Being strong doesn’t mean you have to respond to rude remarks.  Don’t retort by throwing insults back at them.  Don’t bring yourself down to their level.  That’s what they want.  Keep your dignity.  True strength is being smart enough to walk away from all the nonsense with your head held high.  Read The Four Agreements.
  6. Join the negativity committee. – No matter how much negativity is thrown at you by others, there is absolutely no need for you to stay put and participate in the self-destruction they choose for their own lives.  You decide how your soul grows.  The extent of your happiness depends on the quality of your thoughts.  So be positive.  Some of the best days of your life haven’t happened yet.
  7. Rush love. – A good relationship is when two people accept each other’s past, support each other’s present, and love each other enough to encourage each other’s future.  So don’t rush love.  Find a partner who encourages you to grow, who won’t cling to you, who will let you go out into the world, and trust that you will come back.  This is what true love is all about, and it’s always worth the wait.
  8. Hold on to those who don’t want to stay. – It’s really painful to say goodbye to someone that you don’t want to let go of, but it’s even more painful to hold on to them if they never wanted to stay in the first place.  If someone doesn’t show you the same love that you show them, and acts as if you are unimportant most of the time, this may be a big clue as to the fact that you don’t need them in your life either.  The only people you truly need in your life are those who respect you and want you to be in theirs.
  9. Ignore every bit of constructive criticism you receive. – The worst lies are the ones we tell ourselves.  A true friend will always speak the truth, even if it hurts.  So don’t assume that every critic in your life is a hater.  Not everyone is hating on you.  Some people truly care about you, and are simply telling you the truth that you have been subconsciously denying.  Read The Mastery of Love.
  10. Give up on yourself. – Maneuvering through difficult times is a lot like driving through dense fog.  You can’t always see where you’re going, you feel a little lost, you want to turn back, and every mile feels like forever.  Yet, scared or fatigued as you might be, there’s nothing you can do but breathe, focus on the road ahead, keep moving forward, and trust that a force with keener vision than yours is out there functioning as your guide.


mastering the art of failing.

Mastering The Art Of Failing     December 8, 2012   Lucy: You learn more when you lose Charlie Brown: Well then I must be the smartest person in world!! If failure would guarantee us success wouldn’t we all be … Continue reading

love. the greatest driving force

In my secret haven…
I hid behind the shadows of yesterday
Myself… I have never given
The choice to let my heart lead the way. Continue reading

I Am who i am.


to not care what other people say….

we learn to live by our own rules….

and break the society’s.
even if people call you names,

the monent that we know ourselves,

is the very moment

that we give our hearts and soul

the power to live a joyful and glorious life.

—-not to mention the filled with L-O-V-E.

Finding Peace In Unstable Times

Finding Peace In Unstable Times

by: Deborah Fairfull



In this article, guest author Deborah Fairfull, talks about some difficult experiences in her life and how she overcame these and found inner peace

When you are surrounded by financial doom and gloom, natural disasters and riots — it is easy to feel negative and uncertain about the future. However this is exactly the time you need to dig down deep inside yourself and tap into your inner strength. This wise, all knowing part of yourself has the ability to transform your life into one that is fulfilling, peaceful and harmonious.

During my life I have experienced many challenging times. The one thing I have discovered without exception, is that when I have been able to accept my current situation it has allowed me to relax, tap into my internal wisdom and my life has begun to flow once more.

Some of my personal challenges have included:

  • Starting up two different businesses, and being faced with challenging cashflow situations that have threatened my survival. By tapping into my inner strength and resourcefulness, I was able to overcome my cashflow problems and create viable businesses that I was able to later sell.
  • Being forced to sell the family home due to economic pressure. This led me on a path of discovery in relation to my internal world. This gave me the courage to work with my true passions paving the way to the joy of expressing my true gifts and talents. This is a different kind of joy, with more depth than the joy I’d experienced before—even though I was in a better financial situation. These discoveries allowed me to rebuild my life in a meaningful and stable way as my life is a reflection of my heart, rather than reacting to external circumstances.
  • Separating from my husband of 15 years whom I had shared three wonderful children with. We reunited four years later, just in time for our 20th wedding anniversary. This journey taught me a lot about learning to see beyond each other’s defenses and instead, appreciate the light and beauty within each other.

I used my tumultuous, unstable times as alchemy for inner peace so I could learn to experience inner stability despite what was going on around me. At the time I couldn’t understand why all these challenging things were happening to me, but I now appreciate them for the gift that they were.

How Do You Find Peace In Unstable Times?

1) Make peace with your past. Worrying over and reliving the past can take you away from enjoying the present, feeling stuck and prevent you flowing with life.

2) Make your mind your friend. Your mind takes you away from your peace by creating worry and stress. Becoming aware of your thoughts, belief and attitudes helps you to transcend a fearful mind and instead create a life that is loving and stable.

3) Your reactions are like gold. A reaction occurs when someone behaves aggressively (fight) or withdraw (flight) in a pressurized situation rather than responding from their empowered self.

However, if you are able to sit with the uncomfortable feeling that the reaction induces, rather than blaming the other person, you will heal that automatic survival response as you tap into a power greater than the reaction. You need to feel it to heal it. Next time you are in a similar situation, chances are you will not let the external circumstance take you away from your peace.

4) Let your intuition be your guide. Your intuition is like your personal GPS designed to guide you safely through life. It is your inner voice of wisdom that knows exactly what is right for you.

However it is common that we override our intuition and do what we “should” do, driven often by a fearful mind. If we make decisions based on anxiety and stress often they are not the very best decisions we can make for ourselves. When you calm your mind you are better equipped to listen to your intuition and create a life that is more flowing and peaceful.

5) Live your life on purpose. It is very hard to be truly happy if you are not expressing your natural talents or taking steps towards this. Sometimes some of life’s greatest challenges such as being retrenched can be life’s greatest gift as it opens up new doors, allowing you to step into what it is you truly love to do. If you look forward to going to work you know you are on the right path.

When you face or have faced challenging times sometimes it is easy to fall into the illusion that something is wrong with you. That you are wrong, damaged or not good enough in some way. This is the ego trying to strengthen its grip.

However, if you can remind yourself that despite any hurts you have been through you are always a divine loving individual you will be able to find that inner peace at the worst of times. When we learn to love, no matter how badly people may have treated us, we step into our true power. This gives us true strength and stability, and we remain stable and balanced despite what is going on around us.

If you’ve gone through particularly challenging experiences in your life, tell us how you overcame these and found the strength and peace within to move forward.


a few days ago, i was trying to figure out what to do with the gifts i am blessed with. i had a hard time figuring it out. i cannot start with the UNMASKED project because that is alread the … Continue reading



i am currently loving all the unexpected gifts i am blessed with. i know this has got to take me somewhere — big. but… lately, i keep discovering all these wonders inside that lay dormant for years and i feel like there is still so much in store for me. i also feel that the realisation of my dreams is really near. how to go about it, i don’t know… i just ride with the tide, i don’t drive. sometimes, it can be frustrating but nevertheless, surprisingly calm. even if the external aspect of my life isn’t as peaceful as it should be… [ i could totally say — true test of peace…]

i am a multitasker. and if there is one thing i like… it is mixing and fixing everything altogether in one. so… i made a list of my “gifts” and the not so wanted character. i like the production part better… it is actually the managing slash routine that is dreadful to me.

for the book – i know that is where i am heading… only i am still not getting the right signal for that. in my heart, that is where i am truly headed. for my ego, i wish to make a big bang explosion when i am launching it… that is my soul. and that is me NAKED in front of everyone. until such time. the timing isn’t ripe yet. it is meant to help others with self improvement, empowerment,….. too much info. :–)

for the dried flowers: i have learned patience, — and the theme of my life: finding beauty in all that is not. so that is also part of me. i like the “vintage-y” feel around. i like all things classic, romantic, ….makes me remember all that i wish to be in..

posters: that is left brain and right brain with my self improvement student and frustrating friend i wish to rise above all the experiences she went through… which is the same as mine. but have not gotten around to it. oh but how she makes me “human” sometimes…. its just a matter of time, and we will combine our “charm” to make something really out of this world in our own little world ….
gosh sabrina— hurry up and ascend a D higher please! let’s rock their world!

printabilities: oh, my only window to creativity when i was with my husband… gift tags and calling cards.

photography: i bought a camera to source out my “window” when i was with my husband. -believe you me, i couldn’t write a decent poem until our beloved pet died. and since i didn’t know i could MAKE pictures then, i decided to take them. probably also because i would rather take pictures because i am supposed to be lighter by a 100lbs. and how i used to love my pictures taken when i was 100lbs lighter… [yeah…vanity is my favorite sin] – but to justify that –  i used to love myself from OUTSIDE IN.

doodles/drawing: this is actually the best thing to ever happen to me— for now. because never in my wildest dream i could draw! i am so ecstatic. i used to visualize my book when i was little that the pictures were hand-drawn. but instead opted for photographs since its too impossible for me to have to draw it. nevertheless, wow…. it is all coming together now. 🙂

cooking: i do small orders from friends and yes, i too can cook. anything!
— except pastries…. too much rules for me. and i can’t break it. and it has to be timed at a certain degree… oh — i can’t do it. NOT YET i suppose.


so basically, i need extra help in prayers for discerning what it really is. this is what is mind boggling. i know my purpose. i know the end of it all. it is just basically to be able to give hope to non believers of true love.. and each one of us… we start within ourselves. and when we have learn to love ourselves, we can sit quietly with ourselves… we love our own company…. and when we can finally sit quietly alone, then true love can peacefully be with us. [lets face it, if we can’t be alone with ourselves, if we dislike our own company…. what makes us think others can too?]
it is just a matter of time. i am blessed with deep knowing and clear seeing (even if at times i challenge it, it smacks me right in front of my face… oh, that is probably why we both kept saying let us work on ourselves. ] ohhh!!! NOW…. [another aha moment!]

its a labyrinthine life i am living and i cannot wait to be in the center. 🙂 with HIM and him.




Thank You Lord for making my life worth living. For helping me find meaning and making me see our purpose very clearly. i ask You not to shield me from any chances that may make me grow and be the best i can be but to give me strength and make me UNSHAKEABLE to rock their worlds for the better….

Continue to bless my kids with such understanding of the whole situation and let them open their hearts to know YOU more too.. and give their lives meaning and purpose too.

Lead me to the right people to know that i am headed in the right direction…. and I am grateful for all the random grace that You continually make me see. LEt me ROCK this life to Your liking. 🙂 coz YOU rock.

and let him lead with his heart through your wisdom. and make him FEARLESS too. 🙂 and believe in himself the way he does with me and the way i do with him. 🙂

PS. i hope you don’t mind that i hardly hear mass.





God sent.

only the two of us, we have a vow
that forever remain the only drive
the promised that has always been kept alive
the only start of the life that we set
years ago… even before we met. Continue reading

love’s inventions.

if mr. webster could come up
with words to describe my heart
i dont think there would be enough
i dont think he’d know where to start. Continue reading

how i come to love the beast in me.


3.33 am

i am a lover of life. and i have come to love every bit of pain, because it is basically what fuels me to learn and to grow. and to appreciate all the good things that life has to offer…

i think its ironic how it is for me. either i love love or i tend to numb myself

“i would rather hurt than feel nothing at all” – Lady Antebellum[need you now.

“I stay because I am too weak to go. I crawl on because it is easier than to stop. I put my face to the window. There is nothing out there but the blackness and the sound of rain. Neither when I shut my eyes can I see anything. I am alone…There is nothing else in my world but my dead heart and brain within me and the rain without.”
Continue reading

the one.

“Your task is not to seek for love,

but merely to seek and

find all the barriers

within yourself that

you have built against it.”

~ Rumi
Continue reading

in harmony.

A restless soul will never ever be at peace

… Life is full of riddles… its always like this

Until the heart accepts the truth

And the soul would always yearn

For what we had in our youth. Continue reading

road travelled less.

funny how life seems to always know

where to make you wander and then go

if only we take the road that people travel less

at the end of the line…

it surely feels the best. Continue reading

for just being you.

and i just want to say…

im really thankful each and everyday…

that when i prayed to be loved so true…

I am blessed for God gave me YOU.
Continue reading

perfect sunrise.

we would see the most beautiful orange skies
just in time for the perfect sunrise.
as the sun beams through the clouds
like the sparkle in our eyes. Continue reading

the next best thing.

….so i tried to run away
from what was meant to stay.
i ran away from my heart
from the day i wanted a new start
i know it would take a lot to let it go
so i did what i thought i’d know. Continue reading

fight for you.

the love we have has always been there

i never ever tried to question that

i should be happy and be more content

to finally know who God has sent.

its just the yearning that is killing me

how i want to hold you and touch your face

and yet i have already come to love the agony
Continue reading