Purpose.


October 1, 2013
Evolution through Exploration
Purposeby Madisyn Taylor

Humans for the most part are not born consciously knowing what their purpose is and it must be found through exploration.

Most living things belong to a particular soul group and are born knowing their purpose in life. An animal will spend its day foraging for food, taking care of itself and its young, and creating a home. No one tells an animal to do this, yet it instinctively knows how. Humans, for the most part, are not born consciously knowing what their purpose is.

Purpose gives our life meaning. When you discover your purpose, you can live your life with intention and make choices that serve your objective for why you are here on the planet. Finding your purpose is not always easy. You must embrace life wholeheartedly, explore many different pathways, and allow yourself to grow.

Your purpose is as unique as you are and will evolve as you move through life. You dont need anyone’s permission to fulfill your purpose, and no one can tell you what that purpose is. Finding and fulfilling your purpose can be a lifelong endeavor. To figure out what your purpose is, ask yourself what drives you , not what forces you out of bed in the morning, but what makes you glad to be alive. Make a list of activities that you wish you were involved in or think about a career path that you would love to embark upon. These are the endeavors that can help you fulfill your purpose and bring you the most satisfaction.

Picture yourself working on projects that dont interest you or fulfill your purpose, yet they help satisfy your basic survival needs. Imagine how living this way each day would make you feel. Next, picture yourself devoting your time to projects that spark your imagination, inspire, excite, and satisfy you. More often than not, these activities are some of the ways that you can fulfill your life purpose. Time spent on these endeavors will never feel like a waste. Live your life with purpose, and you will feel significant and capable because every action you take and each choice you make will have meaning to it.

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Searching. And waiting. And waiting. And loving.


I have been reading the celestine prophecy. At the start.. it states that humans are suffering from restlesness we cannot understand. So we instead of sitting still and feeling the peace within.. we hurry up and find security in all the wrong places possible. I understand it perfectly well. Even when things have been so smooth in my life before.. something stirs up inside me and i cannot just be still. Its like i have an incessant hunger and thirst that no amount of food and water that money can buy cannot quench it. Relationship covered it when it was new.. but then… i was back to first stage. Until i have come to build a relationship with myself and my art. Only then i have quenched and understood and found what i was looking for.
Situations suck… its basically downhill.but that didnot stop me from being positive and whenever i possibly can.. i choose to help those in need more than my own luxiory. It brings a deep feeling of fulfillment and bliss that lasts longer than anything else…

And the abundance ….and life seems to happen right before my eyes… like magic… 🙂 i became more open to all the possibilities that life and the universe provides… for example… i called my dad and asked him to send money for my daughters allowance and food tomorrow and he said he’ll send tomorrow. But i insisted that he send today… even if it isnt cash.. like rice and fresh veggies instead of the money.. and the very second i sent my message… not even 30 seconds… my brother was downstairs… with rice and fish and other stuff from the farm from my grandmother. I intentionally didnt want my daughter to see me worry about basic needs being unmet due to his dad’s business. Lean months is always a chance for us to humble ourselves…
So as i write this. I am thinking of a really special person whos always been close to my heart… having little and not enough to keep us afloat make me realize how life seems to be unfolding to our hearts’desires…..
And my first love… J… we came to a closure …our relationship have become platonic. True love indeed… we have surpassed the jealousy and all… but we just couldnt find balance and we werent inlove anymore. The romance died and he was a preparation too for where my heart and soul is. This cute young couple friends hanging out… in silence. I know why i used to make them on their backs facing us… its because i turned my back on the possibility of something beautiful to unfold.

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Till the skies fall down.
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Solitude

This gallery contains 12 photos.


Dream of me

Unsaid.


Some things are better left unsaid… maybe someday… ill get my friend back.

The sketches i made… why they used to be on their bacs probably explains because i turned my back on taking a chance with him in 2001. Everytime i do them i could feel the peace that the friendship brings. There is the sweet innocence and the sincerity of an unspoken love between them.

Vulnerability. It makes us run away from all the good things in store for us.

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puzzle piece.


please comment and let me know your thoughts about these artwork… for the longest time, i couldnt quite put my finger why i made this… until very recently. any comments, thoughts and ideas or insights is very much welcome…

 

 

ill make a second post about this…

discovering our true selves.


Discovering True Selves
Soul Seeing
by Madisyn Taylor

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The soul is the purest expression of an individual and is not bound by physical forms or fleeting emotions.

When we want to see deeply into the heart and mind of another person, soul seeing, also called soul gazing, allows us to see their soul. The soul is the purest expression of an individual and is not bound by physical forms or fleeting emotions. Through a simple art that involves looking deeply into a partner’s eyes, soul seeing can show you a person’s inner beauty that you might otherwise miss. It is possible for someone who appears cold to have a warm, giving, nurturing soul or someone of average appearance to have a beautiful soul. Soul seeing is a way of looking past shapes, sizes, attitudes, and behavior to see the real individual that lies beneath the surface. It allows you to see the true essence of another person, the radiance of their being, and their spirit within.

Soul seeing is accomplished by sitting face to face with another person. It is helpful to first state your intention before you begin. As you stare softly into each other’s eyes without stopping to look away, each of your souls is revealed to the other. Try not to look for anything in particular or seek traits you’re hoping to find. Simply let the other person’s soul reveal itself to you. After twenty minutes have passed, stay where you are and share a period of silent reflection with your partner for two minutes. You may have suddenly seen your partner’s inner nature as clearly as a bright day, or you may need to meditate on your experience before you feel comfortable with your impressions. Either way, soul seeing can be a wonderfully intimate and shared experience.

So little of who each of us is can be captured by our appearance or personality. The thoughts, fears, desires, and longings that are part of what makes us whole are not always written across our faces. Often, the most surprising thing you may learn while soul seeing is that while you and the other person may appear on the surface to be quite different, you actually share many of the same inner qualities. And then there is the unique beauty that resides within that is longing to be revealed to another who is willing to see. Soul seeing can help you experience the people in your life as they truly are, beyond any mental barriers or physical limitations.

source: the daily om

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heart speaks.


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I yearn for you.

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playing with the memories.


Once in a while
I hear a note or two
I close my eyes and smile
And i think of you.
You wrapped my heart around
With the most heavenly sound
I play with the memories
It seems crazy but i cant resist.
You make my heart sing a song or two
I wonder how id ever get through
All the storms that life had showered
Wishing that i would always remember
Every little detail and i would paint
Wonderful colors without restraint
Its hard to believe that im going through this
My heart sings…
When im playing with the memories.

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♡♡

from dusk till dawn.


the fire never dims…. if anything but
it will always spark only this time
it will be bottled within and….
waiting… time and again…
for both fire and ice to merge
and let their souls play
the melody that they sang for so long
like the evening sky
from dusk till dawn. Continue reading

moments.


I would love it so much if you take a break

And think of me and how much I ache

To spend as many moments we can have together

Even if we know that we will always have forever.
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misbehave.


  My heart tells me to go But my body kept saying no I wanted to leave, wanted to flee Somehow… it didnt feel like me. I wanted to be near you I wanted to touch you My heart kept … Continue reading

more restless soul.


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concealed intentions.

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the deception of darkness.

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crab mentality.

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emerging soul.

Knowing Better and Doing Better: How Are You Fortunate?


Knowing Better and Doing Better: How Are You Fortunate?

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Gratitude, the level of gratitude that one has, varies greatly by person. You have those that are grateful for every single thing in their lives, and those that know what the word means on paper yet never practice it in their own lives.

Then you have so many others (like myself), I call them the “in-betweeners.” We are grateful for so much but often forget this because life takes over, or so many other things are going on at once that you barely have five minutes to yourself to even drink a glass of water, let alone practice gratitude.

And so you continue on in your day and life with thoughts and good intentions to give back more to those who are unfortunate or volunteer more—and then it doesn’t happen.

I can vouch for this; I did this all the time. I meant well and really did want to help others, yet life takes over.

As I ate my lunch at my desk, mindlessly reading a celebrity gossip blog, I came across something in passing. This one blogger in particular was rallying all of her followers to support her for an event she was taking part in that would help support homeless youth.

As I read further, I came to see that this event was a sleep out, where she would sleep on the street and experience homelessness firsthand. I’m not sure why exactly, but I promised that if that event ever came to New York City I would do the same—and it did.

With a day of hesitation that was filled with thoughts of me leaving my children overnight and questioning if I really wanted to do this, I signed up—fast, before I could change my mind.

And so there I was, rallying my family, friends, and coworkers to help me reach the $1,000 minimum in two short weeks. I never realized how many people would actually support me; I exceeded the minimum by $200.

Fast forward to the night of the event: I had two sick children at home and felt guilty for leaving them, but still, I walked into this event on my own without knowing a soul there.

The organization had a schedule for the evening prior to the sleep out, when we got to meet some of the kids that we were helping that night. I met some of the most amazing kids that I have ever encountered.

These people have endured and survived so much. Listening to their stories and having them sit directly across from me was life changing. I now had a face to associate with homeless youth and, in some instances, their homeless children.

I heard stories of sleeping near a hospital for fear of giving birth on the streets, finding their own mother dead at the age of 16, and leaving adoptive parents that abused them and suffering a stroke at the age of 18, due to stress.

The life experiences of these kids cannot compare to so many of us, and yet I felt so connected and privileged to be able to help them in any way.

After our meetings, we retreated to the sidewalk that we would be sleeping on, which emulated what so many face nightly. We got our cardboard boxes, sleeping bag, and trash bag for insulation and laid down to sleep.

And that is when it happened—my “aha” moment. As I laid there among strangers who were all doing this for the same cause, it hit me: I am more than fortunate! I have healthy children, a loving husband, a warm bed that is ours, a refrigerator that, thankfully, is filled with food, a home—the list goes on and on.

These are things that I have almost have come to expect, yet they are not owed to any of us.

My entire perspective changed. How dare I complain about not having those shoes I saw at some store or that the grocery store didn’t have the one item I needed or whatever thing it is that annoyed me and wasted my time.

I see things differently, because from this experience I am different now. I am more mindfully grateful for everything, and in turn I have seen the beauty in so much that I have missed before.

I am a new person on the inside. I am grateful and more determined to make the time I am given much more meaningful. Now that I know better, I need to do better.

This event was just the start for me. I am actively looking for new and inventive ways to give back.

Look around and be grateful for the smallest things. Once you become more mindful of it, your world starts to change.

from dusk till dawn. sunkissed.


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sunkissed.

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dusk till dawn first layer.

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from dusk till dawn

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yinyang koi. (20%)

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a place from my memory. i may not see this place again…but i can always revisit it in my heart.

may 2013

This gallery contains 9 photos.


end of the rainbow. secret garden. “we cant fight the waves but we can learn how to surf.” -Jon Kabat Zinn treasured teardrops. – God complex. (inner turmoil) let your love rain down. take me back to my first love. … Continue reading

Living Into Your Life Purpose


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Living Into Your Life Purpose
Fear of Our Purpose

We all have a creative vision and a purpose for our life lurking around in the background of our lives but our every day minds try to keep it out of our consciousness. Our purpose – in a nutshell – is to become who we are meant to become. It is this higher quality of being, this heightened attitude, or this value that we want to live into that is most often different from our family of origin and the circumstances of our upbringing.

Our purpose involves invoking some kind of positive feeling state that we want to become a permanent part of our character – that is most often opposite to how we were raised. What we truly need to heal our families is often what we most fear because we no longer fit into the ego system of winning love that we are used to.

We are all meant to bring something new to life that is a progression and an improvement on how we were raised. We are wired to fit in and we long to be who we really are. If you were to look at all of your dreams and desires, they would have a higher quality of feeling state behind them that you are not fully living into just yet. Likely you feel a conflict between who you were supposed to be – “to get along” and “not rock the boat” – with who you really are designed to be in your purpose.

Opening Up Your Feelings

The importance of finding the feeling state behind your purpose is so you can begin living into your vision everyday. Creativity, for example is one quality that I feel called to live into and so it becomes a way for me to develop my character and give to the world. Creativity helps me loosen my conditioning and my encultured views about what is right and wrong. It has helped me free up my sexuality. Creativity opens my mind to the spirit of new possibilities. Creativity helps me move more easily into “taboo” areas of my consciousness to heal and accept them. Through my creativity I have learned how to see more deeply into life, to be present, to listen within, to be more spontaneous and trusting.

Perhaps you sense your purpose is coming up in your consciousness and you are repressing it right back down again. Perhaps you think your purpose is too big or too ridiculous to follow through on. You may feel you purpose involves being new and different in your family, in your workplace, or in your culture – and you fear not fitting in. We often tell ourselves that we do not have the strengths, courage, talents or capacities to live into our purpose. Or maybe we are caught in blaming other people for how we feel and have conveniently “forgotten” our purpose nearly entirely.

Psychologist Chuck Spezzano writes about how our entire psychology actually revolves around needing to live and then obstructing our purpose. “I have found that about 85% of our problems were constructed as an obstruction to our purpose. The remaining 15% were problems that were necessary to learn lessons vital to our purpose.”

We really do have places to fill in life that are uniquely ours to occupy. This may not always involve being famous or even always making money. But our life purpose always involves giving to life and bonding and connecting with other people in some kind and helpful way. This requires that we move into the greatest strength that we can muster. It involves letting go of old hurt. You could call your life purpose your unique way of loving life and other people. Ask yourself this question, “How do I uniquely want to love give to life?” Be sure to check into where you are afraid. You might even ask, “What do I need to give to life? What am I I afraid to give to life?”

Progressing as a Whole

Having worked in a hospital setting facilitating art for the elderly and interacting with over 500 people including patients and staff, I see that we all have a part to play in the organization of whatever human system that we live and work in. And no one is inessential. Some of the best people I have met are not necessarily the people who are at the top of the organization or who are making the most money. The people who are most on purpose are the one’s who are giving to the reality of their day in an authentic, intelligent and mature way that considers the whole of the situation.

African Elder Malidoma Some puts it this way:

“Every person is sent to this outpost called earth to work on a project that is intended to keep the cosmic order healthy. Any person that fails to do what he or she must do energetically stains the cosmic order.”

When We Don’t Live Into Our Purpose We Become Depressed

Failing to keep the cosmic order healthy in our corner of the world in my sense of it, is the number one cause of depression and anxiety. We are all wired to give to life. What I have found is that we as humans tend to beat ourselves up for not living into some grand looking, far reaching, meaningful purpose that gets us noticed and approved of by others. And so we miss the small essential progressions that must be made in our character and in our practical life so that we can move forward in a daily, incremental way towards a unique contribution.

Life essentially requires that we round ourselves out in all areas and living into our purpose is the fire that burns away all of the “fat” of our psychological hurts, struggles and fears. Every characteristic that we struggle with must be transformed in order to take our larger journey towards our purpose. Each day we are being called by our life situations to grow and to round out our character. Often our life purpose asks us to change in ways that are uncomfortable. It requires that we see our part in everything that has ever happened to us and use our life experience for love and healing purposes. These required changes bring up much psychological material to be healed.

Rounding Out Our Character

We also must progress as a whole regarding the other people in our life. Not everyone can take the journey with us. Often our growth will incite disturbances and resistance in our family of origin and in our immediate family and friendship circles. This does not mean that we write off everyone in our midst, but that we will start to make choices about where we want to focus our positive energy and where it can be received.

Our purpose always involves and affects other people. We are each embedded in life situations where all of our choices have impact. This means if we are not moving forward towards our purpose we need to ask, “What do I need to give to my life situation right now? or “What is life wanting me to give, be, or do right now so that I can move forward in my growth?”

We have to be alert to how we need to change to give meaningfully to the reality of our life as it is right now. This can mean just a small step of starting to exercise so that we can feel more physical and psychological strength for the journey ahead. We all have inklings of how we need to change and grow each day. Following these small steps opens us up to more clues, more clarity, and the magic of a life on purpose. This “following our nose” is how we find our place in the fabric of life. This is how we evolve our life, our purpose, and our world. We sense into what is required of us in the present moment by one small, kind act at a time.

Taking the responsibility to grow in small and healthy ways lifts the burden of our depressions and disappointments off of our loved ones. We free those who love us by choosing to be our best selves. Each day we do what we can to positively uplift the fabric of our life. This is how we evolve as families, as work groups, and as larger and evolving systems. Perhaps the biggest mistake people make in pursuing their purpose is thinking that they can progress as an individual entity and that they step over other people in pursuit of their goals. From our ego selves we want to have a “win” right now. We can easily forget that we are a part of a larger network of connection that needs to progress along with the needs of the whole.

Living Into Purpose in Increments

I think when we are creative people we often see things years and years in advance. It is important to understand that it can take a long time to live into a big vision. I often tell people to vision big. Use your big vision to inspire your passion to grow and change in positive ways. But do not be discouraged if your purpose does not get “finished” in your lifetime. Even if we just choose to embody a quality in the world, such as love, peace appreciation or generosity, we never quite finish. We can live our lives to a point, and then we can inspire other people to carry on or contribute to our mission.

Often we need to live into larger systems and play our one part in the symphony of something much larger that is trying to come into this life. For example I may not be able to change the entire world’s view of the benefits of art and healing, but I have a part to play in my corner of the world. As the Talmud says, “You are not required to finish the work, neither are you free to desist from it.”

Life as a human being is sometimes slow moving and we most often progress by increments. It requires so much to live a full multidimensional life. Everything needs to become enriched on the road to our purpose. Everything needs to become healthier as we become healthier. For those who do not want to accompany us on our journey to truth, health, love and purpose, they have the choice to grow or fall away.

For myself, having long been a prolific creator, I have had to take many side steps to get my family life, my emotional life, and my practical home and working life in healthy and loving order, before I can take the next step towards my creative visions and purposes. Life progresses in wholes.

I have had to take the time to appreciate and celebrate my life the way it is, even though as a visionary thinker, I can see the potentials I have not yet lived into yet – sometimes painfully and acutely. I have learned how to not be so disheartened and to keep my eye on the small immediate steps that life is calling me to. Often it is just an immediate thought, feeling or action that is not in alignment with my purpose that needs to be expressed, accepted and integrated before I can move forward in a positive way.

Patience is Required for the Journey

I encourage people to have great patience. If you were to look at your life 20 years ago you may see many things that you only dreamed of are now a given, practical reality for you now. Even if your life feels drab and heavy right now it is important to see and feel a finer reality for yourself. I have found it very helpful, during dark times to just “pretend” and live as though my purposeful visions are true even as I go about my seeming mundane tasks. This “living into purpose” starts to organize itself in mysterious ways. Creation is very supportive of our creativity and will give us little encouragements affirmations that we are on the right path.

In this way we reach towards our purpose and in turn, our purpose reaches towards us. Lousia May Alcott the writer of Little Women and a “transcendentalist” (early new age spiritualist) – in the earlier part of the century wrote:

” Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead. ”

I used to feel discouraged by this quote when I was younger because I expected the life that I wanted would manifest instantly. And yet I was also encouraged because I sensed that I needed to have the time to evolve slowly and to make the needed changes – in my character, in my family and in my working world – to be able to live the creative vision and purpose that I have for my personal life.

Learning to Appreciate the Journey

Often we have much to sort out as we learn to live a visionary and purposeful life. I have found that it has taken years for me – to feel clear enough psychologically and emotionally – to be able to focus on my creative visions for significant amounts of my day. In the meantime, I have had to sort out layers of emotional conflicts in my family, in my love partnership, in my parenting and inside of myself. Living into what is personally meaningful – even if it has not fully shown up yet – is what being “on purpose” means.

Living into what is meaningful for you could be as simple as making an attitude change even though at the moment you are not seeing your purpose “on the outside” just yet. If your attitude is one of impatience or frustration that you are not living the life you want, perhaps you could see how it would feel to live into appreciation for what is right in front of you. Seeing the beauty right now invites inspirational clues into your everyday life. What attitude would you change today so that you can begin living into your purpose? A good question to ask yourself is to ask is, “Who would I have to be to live my vision in the world?” Then start to build your character into that quality. Change is possible.

Change Is Only Found in Taking Action

Aster Barnwell, writer and spiritual teacher describes how creating deep changes in our being begins by taking action. Action is absolutely necessary for change and it does not have to be grand and sweeping action. It can be a small daily practice of living into who we want to become with a determined attitude to shift our depressions into positive life appreciations. We can start to see even the tiniest good in each moment and watch it grow into a visionary, creative life. As Aster puts it, when we start to live into the higher aspects of our nature because they recalibrate our being – we begin to sculpt a “new me”.

“Our hormonal and nerve impulses will change to correspond to the new person we are becoming. Once we have achieved this degree of change we are able to do “good deeds” without any expectation of reward. Good deeds are now a natural and spontaneous expression of our beings as a result of our consciousness becoming established at a higher level. We can start by making small changes in our life by focusing on little things.”

in the presence of difficulty, practice compassion.


In The Presence of Difficulty Compassion by Madisyn Taylor January 29, 2013 True compassion recognizes that all the boundaries we perceive between ourselves and others are an illusion. Compassion is the ability to see the deep connectedness between ourselves and … Continue reading

Wining Isn’t Everything


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January 30, 2013
Wining Isn’t Everything
Competing with Yourself

by Madisyn Taylor
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When we are satisfied with our life, we do not look for experiences of winning and losing to define our self-worth.


The urges that drive us to compete with others tend to be straightforward. Years of both evolution and societal influences have shaped us to pit ourselves against our peers. The needs and desires that inspire us to compete with ourselves, however, are entirely personal and thus far more complex. A need to outdo our earlier efforts—to confirm that we have grown as individuals—can motivate us to reach new heights of accomplishment. We are capable of using our past achievements as a foundation from which we venture confidently into the unknown. Yet if this drive to compete with our former selves is the result of low self-worth or a need to prove ourselves to others, even glowing successes can feel disheartening. Examining why we compete with ourselves enables us to positively identify those contests that will enrich our existence.

There are many reasons we strive to outdo ourselves. When we are ambitious in our quest for growth, we are driven to set and meet our own expectations. We do not look to external experiences of winning and losing to define our sense of self-worth. Rather, we are our own judges and coaches, monitoring our progress and gauging how successful we have become. Though we seek the thrill of accomplishment tirelessly, we do so out of a legitimate need to improve the world or to pave the way for those who will follow in our footsteps. Be careful, though, that your competitiveness is not the result of an unconscious need to show others that you are capable of meeting and then exceeding their standards.

Consider, too, that successful efforts that would be deemed more than good enough when evaluated from an external perspective may not satisfy our inner judge, who can drive us ruthlessly. In order to attain balance, we have to learn the art of patience even as we strive to achieve our highest vision of who we are. When we feel drained, tense, or unhappy as we pursue our goals, it may be that we are pushing ourselves for the wrong reasons. Our enthusiasm for our endeavors will return as soon as we recall that authentic evolution is a matter not of winning but of taking pride in our progress at any pace.

failure.

This gallery contains 5 photos.


May 8, 2013 Failure Choose Your Words by Madisyn Taylor http://www.dailyom.com All you have to do is speak or read the word failure and see how it makes you feel. The word failure puts forward a very simplistic way of … Continue reading

6 ways you are your own worst enemy.


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6ways you are your own worst enemy.
http://www.marcandangel.com/2013/05/07/6-ways-you-are-your-own-worst-enemy/#more-598

For the longest time I had tunnel vision and expected life to be a certain way. I studied my failures until I lost sight of my successes. I surrendered my dreams to feel a sense of comfort. I crafted limiting beliefs and shielded myself from love and happiness by refusing to put myself out there. And as I did all of this, I sat back and wondered why life was so miserable.

Obviously, I was very lost.

I began to turn things around about a decade ago when my stubborn habits led me into a chaotic argument with Angel. As we both stared at each other through tears, she said, “Marc, you are the enemy – your enemy. It’s your choices. I can’t sympathize any longer. You can choose differently if you want to, but you have to want to. Please want to!” And after some extensive soul-searching, lots of reading, a little sabbatical, and continuous support from a loving wife and a few close friends, I learned to choose differently and eventually found myself again.

I tell you this because I know you struggle with similar inner demons – occasionally we all do. Sometimes our thoughts and routine choices are our biggest enemies. Which is why I want to remind you to beware of…

Final Reminder: We just released the Audio Book for 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently. And we also have a limited time bundle of our eBook, audio book and bonus material on sale for a big discount. Click here to check it out!

1. Your expectation of constant contentment.

Nothing in life is constant. There is neither absolute happiness nor absolute sadness. There are only the changes in our moods that continuously oscillate between these two extremes.

At any given moment we are comparing how we currently feel to how we felt at another time – comparing one level of our contentment to another. In this way, those of us who have felt great sadness are best able to feel heightened feelings of happiness after we emotionally heal. In other words, happiness and sadness need each other. One reinforces the other. Humans must know misery to identify times of elation.

The key is to focus on the good. May you live each moment of your life consciously, and realize that all the happiness you seek is present if you are prepared to notice it. If you are willing to appreciate that this moment is far better than it could have been, you will enjoy it more for what it truly is. (Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the Happiness and Growth chapters of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)

2. Your obsession with examining personal failures.

Imagine being enrolled in five college classes in which you achieved one A, two B’s and two C’s. Would you concentrate on the A or the C’s? Would you berate yourself for falling short in the C classes? Or would you capitalize on your obvious interest and aptitude in the subject matter of the A class? I hope you realize the value of the latter.

Every morning when you wake up, think of three things that are going well in your life at the moment. As you fall asleep every night, fill your mind with an appreciation for all the small things that went well during the day. Examine your successes.

Give the power of your thinking to the positive influences in your life, and they will grow stronger and more influential every day. Remind yourself often of what works well and why, and you’ll naturally find ways to make lots of other things work well too. The most efficient way to enjoy more success in life is not to obsess yourself with what hasn’t worked in the past, but instead to extend and expand upon the success you already know.

3. Your urge to surrender to the draw of comfort.

The most common and destructive addiction in the world is the draw of comfort. Why pursue growth when you already have 400 television channels and a recliner? Just pass the chip dip and lose yourself in a trance. WRONG! That’s not living – that’s existing. Living is about learning and growing through excitement and discomfort.

Life is filled with questions, many of which don’t have an obvious or immediate answer. It’s your willingness to ask these questions, and your courage to march confidently into the unknown in search of the answers, that gives life it’s meaning.

In the end, you can spend your life feeling sorry for yourself, cowering in the comfort of your routines, wondering why there are so many problems out in the real world, or you can be thankful that you are strong enough to endure them. It just depends on you mindset. The obvious first step, though, is convincing yourself to step out of your comfort zone. (Read The Road Less Traveled.)

4. Your self-limiting beliefs.

You do not suffer from your beliefs. You suffer from your disbeliefs. If you have no hope inside of you, it’s not because there is no hope, it’s because you don’t believe there is.

Since the mind drives the body, it’s the way you think that eventually makes the dreams you dream possible or impossible. Your reality is simply a reflection of your thoughts and the way you routinely contemplate what you know to be true. All too often you literally do not know any better than good enough. Sometimes you have to try to do what you think you can’t do, so you realize that you actually CAN.

It all starts on the inside. You control your thoughts. The only person who can hold you down is YOU.

5. Your resistance to being vulnerable.

Love is vulnerability. Happiness is vulnerability. The risk of being vulnerable is the price of opening yourself to beauty and opportunity.

Being vulnerable is not about showing the parts of you that are polished; it’s about revealing the unpolished parts you would rather keep hidden from the world. It’s about looking out into the world with an honest, open heart and saying, “This is me. Take me or leave me.”

It’s hard to consciously choose vulnerability. Why? Because the stakes are high. If you reveal your authentic self, there is the possibility that you will be misunderstood, judged, or even rejected. The fear of these things is so powerful that you put on an armored mask to protect yourself. But, of course, this only perpetuates the pain you are trying to avoid.

The truth is nothing worthwhile in this world is a safe bet. Since love and happiness are born out of your willingness to be vulnerable – to be open to something wonderful that could be taken away from you – when you hide from your vulnerability, you automatically hide from everything in life worth attaining. (Read Daring Greatly.)

6. Your expectations of how things are supposed to be.

There’s this fantasy in your head about how you think things are supposed to be. This fantasy blinds you from reality and prevents you from appreciating the genuine goodness that exists in your life.

The solution? Simple: Drop the needless expectations. Appreciate what is. Hope for the best, but expect less.

You have to accept reality instead of fighting it. Don’t let what you expected to happen blind you from all the good things that are happening. When you stop expecting people and things to be perfectly the way you had imagined, you can enjoy them for who and what they truly are.

Your turn…

In what way are you your own worst enemy? Please leave us a comment below and let us know.

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full bloom


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full bloom.

Common Traits of the Creative Personality


Common Traits of the Creative Personality
Jack Kerouac once said, “Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes, the ones who see things differently; they change things; they push the human race forward . . . because the ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do” (Seldes, 1995).

Kerouac could very well have been describing the creative personality, for research has demonstrated that highly creative individuals don’t think or act like the rest of us. They are indeed different, and in quite a few ways.

Link between Creativity and Eccentric Behavior

Do you think that most creative people are a bit “strange”? If so, you’re probably not alone, and, what’s more, you’re right. In fact, according to Shellye Carson, in an article for Scientific American (2011), “People who are highly creative often have odd thoughts and behaviors, and both creativity and eccentricity may be the result of genetic variations that increase cognitive disinhibition—the brain’s failure to filter out extraneous information.” For example, “people who score high for creative achievement in the arts are more likely to believe in telepathic communication, dreams that foretell the future, and past lives” (Carson, 2011).

Creative Individuals Think Differently

In Understanding Creativity: The Interplay of Biological, Psychological, and Social Factors (1998), John Dacey and Kathleen Lennon discuss Edward deBono’s concept of “lateral thinking” and “vertical thinking” (p. 177). As deBono maintains, according to Dacey and Lennon, there is “a distinction between vertical thinking (which means mental operations that move in a straight line back and forth between lower and higher level concepts) and lateral thinking (which means looking for alternative ways of defining and interpreting a problem)” (1998, p. 177).

As per Dacey and Lennon, deBono contrasts lateral and vertical thinking in this manner:

Vertical thinking is selective, whereas lateral thinking is generative. Vertical thinking is aimed at finding the right solution by following one path, but lateral thinking is more concerned with richness than with rightness, and is therefore more likely to generate numerous pathways of thought.
Vertical thinking is analytical, whereas lateral thinking is provocative. Lateral thinkers seek information not for its own sake but for its ability to provoke or shock them. It does not even have to be true, as long as it is effective. (Dacey & Lennon, 1998, p. 177)
While there are other dissimilarities between lateral and vertical thinking, according to deBono, space doesn’t permit discussion of them all, but suffice it to say that it isn’t surprising that research shows that most highly creative individuals tend to be lateral, not vertical, thinkers.

Creative Personalities Explore and Experiment

Dr. Willis Harman and Harold Rheingold, coauthors of Higher Creativity: Liberating the Unconscious for Breakthrough Insights (1994) maintain that one of the traits of the creative personality is the ability to toy with elements and concepts. For example, according to Harman and Rheingold, creative individuals tend to look at colors and shapes, as well as relationships, ideas, and problems, and then form hypotheses. They might ask, “What if I look at this from a different angle? What if I try this instead of doing it the way it’s always been done?” And through this process of exploration, they find novel and innovative ways to make things, accomplish tasks, solve problems, express ideas, or adapt to situations, etc.

Relatedly, Dacey and Lennon cite a study by Guilford demonstrating how of the five operations of the structure of intellect (cognition, memory, divergent and convergent thinking, and evaluation), divergent and convergent thinking are most important in relation to creativity. Why? Because when people employ divergent thinking, they are able to generate a wide variety of ideas and possible solutions, and when they employ convergent thinking, they are able to identify the ideas and solutions that are most viable out of all possible ideas and solutions (Dacey & Lennon, 1998).

Additional Traits of Highly Creative People

According to Dacey and Lennon, of all traits shared by creative people, “tolerance of ambiguity” is a “consistent hallmark,” for it takes “a greater degree of strangeness or ambiguity to cause fear or terror” in such people than in others (1998, p.99). In fact, creative people tend to “find strangeness interesting or exciting rather than frightening,” which fosters within them “the ability to react creatively” (Dacey & Lennon, 1998, p. 99).

Another common trait is “freedom from sex-role stereotyping.” A study by Roe, as cited by Dacey and Lennon, concluded that “. . . high creativity requires that individuals have some of the qualities usually ascribed to the opposite sex.” Creative males, for example, say Dacey and Lennon, might possess “sensitivity to the feelings of others,” normally viewed as a feminine trait, while females might possess assertiveness, normally viewed as a masculine trait (1998, p. 109).

A third commonality is “flexibility.” Citing Smith and Amner (1997), Dacey and Lennon say, “. . . the creative person is flexible in being open to the world, open to change, and prepared to bring about such change” (p. 104).

Lastly, individuals who are extremely imaginative tend to have superior memories, yet they not only possess “the ability to remember large quantities of information but also the uncanny capacity to recognize what is worth remembering and what to avoid storing in the first place” (Dacey & Lennon, 1998, p. 194).

In closing, creativity researcher Frank Barron says, “The creative person is more primitive and more cultured, more destructive and more constructive, crazier and saner than the average person” (Harman & Rheingold, 1994, p. 23). Yet, perhaps the best way to describe highly creative individuals is to compare them to the late Steve Jobs, because they, too, perhaps invariably long “to put a ding in the universe” (Heller, 2011), and although most never achieve that goal on the same grand scale as the founder of one of the largest technology companies on Earth, they yet manage to alter the universe in their own unique way.

Sources:

Carson, S. (2011) The Unleashed Mind: Why Creative People Are Eccentric. April 14, 2011. Retrieved from scientificamerican.com

Dacey, J. & Lennon, K. (1998) Understanding Creativity: The Interplay of Biological, Psychological, and Social Factors. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, a Wiley Company

Harman, W. & Rheingold, H. (1994) Higher Creativity: Liberating the Unconscious for Breakthrough Insights. New York: St. Martin’s Press

Heller, S. (2011) The Job Jobs Did. New York Times. August 25. Retrieved from nytimes.com

Seldes, G, ed. (1995) The Great Thoughts. New York: Ballantine Books

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serenity.


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om. (93%)

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serenity (97%)

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luck. (this is trying to paint ann orchid but i dont know why it came out like this…lol) definitely nit done yet. i was trying too hard to unblock my creative juices..

little angel.

little angel.


this is for a very special little girl who has gone to heaven to be an angel… though we never met you, i know you will always be around to look after everyone… especially the little kids in the family.

life is a paradox.


We spend our whole life searching

For our one true love

And we also have to accept our fate

That to wait forever is just never too late Continue reading

little voice.


I thought I had lived

I heard a silent scream inside

That I wasn’t really alive

And I might as well be dead.

Said a little voice inside my head. Continue reading

all boxed in and dasies.


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colorfully chaotic

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controlled chaos

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if you live in a box, make sure its a colorful box.

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always you.

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fire and ice

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blooming

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winter bloom.

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practice canvas, the past few days, i kept obsessing on flowers and thinking about my grandmother whom i havent visited for the longest time. i got to see her last march when she came over though.
how she loves to landscape. she was sick the past months.. and i thought to myself how sad it mustbe that she coudnt work on her garden. i planned to give her the blooming since she loves to hang baskets around the house. was thinking of putting it where my grandfather’s urn is. anyway.. my aunt was here a whike ago and she to,d me that she was landscaping and is out in the garden again…. and i got to do this.. finally satisfied with it…

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flowers for grandma.