Once there used to be chaos inside my heart I had everything… so much more from the start I couldn’t quite put my finger why But deep inside was the saddest cry. The cry was the sound of my fear Though i wanted to … i couldn’t shed one tear So i felt like i wasn’t human at all There was a yearning to make that call. When the wind blew against my cheek The longing to feel was something that made me weak. I knew there was more to life than that I can almost feel the wind giving me a quick pat. Once there was restlessness inside my soul My search for meaning and purpose to be whole Made me fight my own battle and war To win is an answer that has quite gotten far. I was hungry for life… I was hungry to live A smile curved my lips, yet inside I couldn’t believe Laughter wasn’t unusual but it was a voice That didn’t come from the heart because of my choice. My choice to live life in monotony After loving and fearing the loss I yearned so bad to run and be free But i wasn’t ready to pay the cost. Once there was emptiness inside me I searched in all the wrong places to fill in the void Pained me more so I tried to avoid. Facing the truth and the never ending thirst How to erase all my past hurts. I denied the truth not only to everyone else … I lied even worse… Coz I lied to myself. And it made my heart feel the wrench So I tried to look for something to quench The longing for me to become whole The thirst inside my heart and my soul. I stayed on… hoping that someday These longings will just go away But it never really did and no matter how hard i try I cover it up with all the things that money can buy. Hoping that maybe it will satisfy All the longings inside that i deny. Once there was turbulence in my life When i had it easy… i looked for strife Anything to make me feel something… Anything to make me feel so alive But i couldn’t find what it was That would want to make me dive. Nothing has pained me even when I began to lose the life that i had then An easy life yet difficult to live When it was a life of lies that i began to weave. A smile from the lips isn’t a smile for me at all An empty smile that was always under control An aching heart that was too proud to accept That i was searching for the imperfect perfect. If life would always be as easy as i had then, That wasn’t the life that I planned live again. A restless soul will never ever be at peace … Life is full of riddles… its always like this Until the heart accepts the truth And the soul would always yearn For what we had in our youth. And up until i finally began to accept and be honest I was put in line to go through a test. What i thought to be the hardest for me Turned out to be what also made me free. Once when there was chaos inside, I was left with a feeling that love has died I was loving but it was a command From my mind that I reprimand When from the start, it never did feel right at all I did what my mind told me so I wouldn’t fall My heart was screaming, my soul was restless And yet, i still never tried to confess. I was left in a corner, and i have never felt so alone With the emptiness that I have never known. Once i vowed to my heart never to feel for you Because of the aches and pain I had gone through Coz nothing or no one ever measured up And my beating heart just began to stop. But I realized that I would rather feel the hurt from you In my mind, i have loved beyond I could ever do When I became what I never was with you. I made up my mind when I made that choice Even if there was a NO from that little unseen voice. So my heart cried and hid an unsung melody Of a song that was sang off key. I began to know that no matter what i do, At the end of the day, my heart and soul still calls out for you. I never stopped hoping and believing that someday You’ll be back in my life and this time, you’ll stay. Until that time comes, I’ve gone through the motions of living i began to realize That I became so good at my own disguise. And when I saw you that one afternoon in October, My heart began to smile when you looked at me Your eyes told me that my pain would now be over For you would stay till eternity. My heart now began to sing a simple melody Of a song that was once ours…. So perfectly. Everything is coming together… you and me forever When the time is right… It will come to us All the pain will be erased from the past. My soul is restless no more I began to feel the way i did before And the tears that for so long I had in store Finally began to fall. My soul finally found the peace and i let my walls crumble When I allowed myself to be once again vulnerable. I began to feel again. I began to defy the fear And learned to sing with joy and cheer. We finally have each other again. Only so much better than what we were then You and I… We are somehow completely whole And we became one with our soul My heart now sings a beautiful melody Forever and Always… YOU & ME. A perfect song written in harmony.