fight for you.


 

1st May 2012

11:57 pm

 

My Dearest Love,

i thought by this time somehow

my yearning wouldve subside

but each and everynight i still

keep wishing you were here by my side.

sometimes i just try to forget

and try to find some things to do

and to myself i make a bet

if you yearn for me the way i do.

i try so hard to get past this

but there are days when i

long for a moment of peace

with you and so i try…

to make the days go by

faster than it already is

have it fast forward to the day

when you and i will share such sweet kiss.

my heart is crying out for you

day and night… there isn’t much i can do

to try to stop yearning and hoping

but i haven’t got a clue.

i know its wrong for me to question

how everything has come to now

i guess there are just things that are meant to happen

so that it’ll be different

fromt the way it was then.

 

the love we have has always been there

i never ever tried to question that

i should be happy and be more content

to finally know who God has sent.

its just the yearning that is killing me

how i want to hold you and touch your face

and yet i have already come to love the agony

as i revel on the memory of your embrace.

sometimes i want to sleep…

because you are always in my dreams….

but when i wake up, it hurts so deep

that nothing is ever as it seems.

 

must we love and suffer and love even more?

every beat of my heart… is that what i am living for

i have no reason to curse and praise time

but my heart i lay on the line.

how is this that i cannot win

the battle that i fight within?

my mind tells me to go and just be

but my heart and soul is pulling you back to me

asking me and begging.. to wait patiently.

just like what you said once before….

a long time ago…. i should’ve waited a little bit more

but i cannot bear to face another day and night

of yearning and missing you ….

its a battle that i just cant fight.

 

in the morning when the day breaks….

i put back on my little charade

to hide the truth… of how my heart aches

to love you more is the only price i paid.

when you are away from me….

day and night…. do you think how i would be?

i see you looking right through me…

when i close my eyes….

my heart beats its silent cries.

does it ever make you wonder too?

how a heart, not broken in two

could hurt so much like crazy

and still find comfort in you and me.

 

we love so much… and we long to touch

we love and yet it hurts so bad …..

to have found each other once again

and share the love we’ve always had….

but couldnt seem to have the perfect time

for the love that is so divine…

and yet… we somehow just finally learn

to seek solace from the love

we’ve always had when we yearn…

how long must we suffer in love ?

how long must we find in all that we have

when apart is the most painful thing

that everyday… i try to just begin

…. coping with the sweet pain

and keep wishing to share moments with you

the way we used to under the rain.

 

i really wish i can make my heart even for just a second

…try to be still and learn to just accept

everything there is for me to …..

and just learn to not think of you.

i dont even wish to forget

because then my mind would beset

my deepest longings of my heart and soul

just the yearning that i can’t seem to move away

its so tiring but its what keeps me going day to day

….because i know i am happier amidst the pain

rather than live a life… and feel nothing again.

 

so my life, each and every moment we spend together

i hold them close to my heart forever…

i pray that somehow, i am so much stronger

now… until i can hold on much longer….

because i know our love will only be

the only love i will hold so deeply…

it will always be something that i will have with me

whether together or apart we are…

i know our hearts will never be far

…..and when you are longing for me too…

please know that i cry wishing for you

…if you may see me with a laugh and with a smile….

thats because try to make each moment worthwhile.

to have found each other… we are more than blessed

and that we are put to test…

i love you and you will always be my one true love

let that be the strength ….the only one i would have

our hearts will always know where to go…

our soul will always know what to do….

for me to defy and to keep the fight for you….

 

i love you so much…

forever yours…

~me.♥

 

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