forever more. [1997]


August 21, 1997

My Dearest Love,

Since you went away

Everything has changed

I try to do things on my own

But it just feels so strange.

I know I was wrong

To have hurt you that way

But I still feel so strong

And hope to hold you again someday.

All the wrong I want to undo

Because my heart still seeks for you

I know I didn’t do what was right

And that is why I get lonely at night.

If there were any way

To make you stay…

Anything… I would do

Just so you’d know I’m still in love with you.

I know you probably don’t feel the same anymore

I’ll hold the love you had for me before

Please help me ease the pain

If only for a second everything is still the same.

All the wrongs I did I now regret

And no matter how much I try,

I still can’t forget

I tried to deny many times

I can’t be hurting.. But my heart’s not kind.

I knew from the start

That you will forever stay in my heart

And I am so sorry that I have hurt you

Please forgive me…

There’s nothing I wouldn’t do.

I know it’s never easy to forgive

And I am so sorry… Please find it in your heart to believe

I was wrong… and I know it can’t be undone

It hurts me so bad now that you’re gone.

If someday soon our hearts would meet

If we fall again, then be it

I promise I wouldn’t hurt you anymore

I’ll forever be true…

You will be my only love…

Forever more.

me

∞                           

April 4, 2012

My Dearest Love,

How were we to know that we would meet 15 years later? and still feel the same way as we did when we were teen agers? i know i hurt you deeply in the past and if there is anything that i can do to erase the pain i caused, i would do it in a heart beat. but i know that those wounds have made you strong and wiser. time stand still when we came face to face… did you know that you were the hightlight of my 2011? and that, after i saw you, i finally know my heart is home.  but unfortunately, we had to go in different directions again and who knows when this love story will finally come to rest?

i always knew you would stay in my heart… but over the years, i numbed my heart from the pain. only to realize after years of struggling with emptiness and hypocrisy was i honest to myself. not only i numbed my heart from pain. i deprived my heart from love. to give and to recieve love. even if you had to go years before… i never should’ve given in to the pain of missing you. i should’ve bottled up my feelings for you and started from there. but we cant do anything about the past anymore.

i hope you know that you are always thought of. and whatever choices you made now… i want you to be happy and this time… my heart will always stay with you..

love always…

-♥ me

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